Reimagine, redesign and rebuild the love you are craving.
Are you worried you are living your life in a disconnected relationship?
If you are choosing to be with each other, damn, you want to be thriving together. Making each other’s life better for having each other in it. But life changes and throws lots of outside noise at our relationship that can impact it, damage our connection, and even make each other feel like the enemy. Sometimes you can build up resentment, or maybe you have simply turned away to lead separate lives. Maybe you don’t know how to reconnect but you DO know no longer are you willing to settle for the unfulfilling dance you have going on now because this is the one and only life you get to live.
So how are you going to choose to love and be loved? Are you ready to renovate what you have with your partner, in order to consciously create something better?
Renovations require smashing down some walls, building new foundations, and then choosing what colour paint to decorate with. Other times we may just need to freshen up with some art and cushions. What we know is if you want the end product to look different from how it is now, you can’t just stand around and moan and bitch, or look at others’ homes with envy wishing yours was different. You have to do the work. And since a relationship is with more than just one person, you both have to do the work.
It can yield great results, but it also requires some hard truthful moments, learning some, sometimes challenging, new tools, and gaining some fresh insights.
If you want change but want to stay passive, please know this isn’t for you. If you are looking to have someone tell you, that you are right and your partner is wrong, this also is not the right place.
My offerings require you to dig deep and take risks but my commitment is to help your relationship be connected, loving, and supportive.
Sessions are designed for you and your partner:
To have tools for each other to be heard, seen, and understood.
To learn new ways to do conflict, where you don’t do more damage.
To be on each other’s team and support each other’s dreams.
To be close. Physically and emotionally.
To share this one precious life in LOVE and enjoying each other.
And we both know, when you feel close to your loved one, everything else in life feels better.
Services
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UNBLOCK YOUR LOVE MASTERCLASS
Feel like you and your partner repeat old patterns that end up with you feeling further apart?
Spend a date night discovering each other’s attachment styles and emotional landscape to help you both be better understood and feel closer.
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LOVERS RECONNECT
Ships in the night? Finding it hard to connect to each other?
Prioritise each other in a variety of ways for closer bonding, more joy and appreciation of each other in this one month challenge.
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COUPLES THERAPY
Only space for one more couple December 2023
Ready to dive deeper with the person you share your life with?
Together learn to deal with conflict better and strengthen communication, intimacy and appreciation. It’s time to renovate your relationship.
Testimonials
“Before we started therapy, I had resigned to the idea that this was as good as it was going to get. We didn’t really fight much, but we weren’t having much fun either and slowly I started to feel really deflated about it and actually got to the point I thought about leaving. That’s when my husband and I decided we had to try something and I am so glad we did. It hasn’t been easy but it 100% has been worth it. I feel closer to him than I have in years and I feel like we are on the same team again. Just wish we had done something like this sooner.”
“The biggest takeaway from seeing Gemma with my partner was learning how to talk about hard things. I hadn’t realised I had been communicating in a way that not only hurt the person I love the most, but it also wasn’t helping me be heard by her.”
“My husband didn’t want to spend the money on therapy, but when I pointed out it was cheaper than a divorce he made the effort.”
“RECONNECT was the perfect circuit breaker. My husband is very busy and stressed with his job and I felt like I was constantly coming last in his priorities. Having the course be accessible at any time, from home made it possible to get him to commit to it. After the month of the challenge, HE TOLD ME, how much better he felt when we made time for each other. We’re now going to start therapy too, not because we are worse, but because we are excited about being even more connected.”
COUPLES
THERAPY
PHASE ONE
Relationship Health Assessment
We begin with the relationship assessment so I can understand where your relationship is, and you and your partner can also get a deeper insight, and then with this information, we can make an individualised plan to work towards strengthening your relationship.
What does it include?
You and your partner will both complete the Gottman Connect Relationship Questionnaire;
You and your partner will both attend a 90-minute consultation with me to obtain a history of your relationship;
After this, you will each attend an individual 90-minute consultation to obtain your personal history;
Then together again, you will both attend a 90-minute feedback consultation during which we will discuss the current condition of your relationship and identify evidenced-based processes, tools and strategies to begin to help you address these. By the end of your feedback consultation you and your partner will have
have a much deeper understanding of both the strengths and challenges in your relationship.
have a greater understanding of what it takes to create a strong, healthy, stable, satisfying and long-lasting relationship based on Gottman’s evidenced-based model and Sue Johnson’s Emotionally Focused Therapy.
receive a broad overview of tools and strategies to help you work towards creating the relationship you both want.
How do we begin?
Once you register with me your interest in your relationship health assessment, you and your partner will each receive an email with links for each of you to complete the questionnaires mentioned above.
You will also receive information about how to book your consultations.
You will receive a written report after your feedback consultation based on the data collected in your Gottman Connect Questionnaire that will provide you with a summary of the strengths and challenges in your relationship.
PHASE TWO
Creating conscious change
After your assessment, couples therapy sessions are scheduled for 90 minutes every week, or second week, to begin.
I can accommodate hour sessions however I find I do not want to rush a process that can sometimes open up tender parts of ourselves and then send you on your way before we can naturally close the session, and I find that 90 minutes generally allows for this.
Sometimes when we are working through a large or multi-layered obstacle if you both choose, we can schedule a 3-hour intensive marathon session
The focus of these sessions will be to help you learn how to move out of painful gridlocked escalated conflict, repair old unprocessed hurts and misunderstandings and move towards a relationship that feels more understanding, connected and attuned. It is a space for couples to re-design, re-imagine and re-build a better more satisfying and happier life together.
It will involve spending time working together at home to ensure you can consistently put your new skills, strategies and behaviours into action, which does require commitment.
How much will it cost?
60- minute sessions cost $160
90-minute sessions cost $209
3-hour intensive cost $405
How long will we need to see you for?
This will vary from relationship to relationship, but these sessions are designed intentionally for the two people in the relationship to heal, grow and connect together. I am only a facilitator and it is my intention to get you both to a place where you do not need me.
However, most couples do need a minimum commitment of three months to a year, depending on the state of their relationship. Once a couple feels confident positive change is woven in between them, we fade out sessions to monthly, then every three or six months, to prevent from relapse.
Elements we focus on:
strengthen and maintain your friendship and intimate connection;
better manage conflict by learning a range of communication skills;
repair when mistakes, misunderstandings or hurtful fights occur;
support each other against the stresses of daily life;
build a culture of appreciation through a range of activities and rituals of connection;
develop shared meaning, understanding and meaningful stories that deepen your connection;
create safety and stability that leads to a long-lasting, successful, satisfying and fulfilling relationship together.
Who is couples therapy for?
Newly together couples, pre-marital couples, newly blended couples, established couples who would like to strengthen their relationship, couples who are experiencing tensions and blocks or who are finding their conflict is getting more distressing and difficult to manage, same-sex, transgender and fluid couples and couples in open relationships.
Please note: Couples who are experiencing concerns with high levels of drug and/or alcohol use, or domestic violence will be referred to a suitable service for couple and/or individual treatment.
ABOUT GEMMA
I merge two decades of knowledge from a variety of modalities from a Masters in counselling, naturopathy, yoga and meditation. I am trained in Gottman Therapy and Emotionally Focused Therapy. I don’t subscribe to one size fits all. I do believe in transformation. I feel that it is the reason we are on this earth. I also believe there is nowhere as poignant to deal with our darkest shadows, most raw triggers and support our hopes and dreams, than within our core relationship.
Yes, first in our own hearts. But ever noticed how you think you’re all healed, and then you get into a relationship and damn, all this shit comes up. It is there FOR you.
I am here for your relationship. Because we do not live separate from each other. We are intertwined beings. And in the space in between, magic can happen.
